NASTY WASPS

 NASTY WASPS

 

LT COL NOEL ELLIS

 

14/XI/2022

 

I got a little late for my morning walk. The sun was still gliding up beyond the horizon but had spread enough light to say the sky would be blue, bright, and clear today. I looked up and thanked the maker for his bounties.

 

As I was passing a row of ‘Ficus’ trees growing along the lane road, some trees had grown over twenty feet and some were still dwarfs. They are surviving in this harsh weather is most important.

 

With ‘Lamba saans’ filling my chest with the pure, fresh, and chilled air of the morning, I put my neck up, when I noticed something quite unusual. Till a few days back there was only one hornet’s nest. Now there were seven massive sized nests. To put them in perspective, as big as a jackfruit. There would be thousands and thousands of those yellow wasps thriving in them.

 

That led me to think about their increased activity on my water lily containers over the last couple of days. Their frequency of visits and numbers had substantially increased. They must be building an empire of sorts.

 

A couple of days back I heard our budding colony footballers discuss “Shahad ki Makhi ka chatta.’ They had thrown a stone and hit the wasp nests to collect honey. A few children who continued playing in the lawns got stung nastily.

 

Stings were my fear, when I found these wasps trying to muster our pot stand. I asked one of them, what are you doing here? She said they were looking for a place to establish a new nest. I warned them to buzz off, before I came with my ‘weapons of wasp destruction.’ To which they didn’t pay heed. A couple of them came towards me doing buzz-buzz-buzz. I stood still, lest I offend them.

 

Then, one came very close to my face. I was prepared to get stung. Good sense prevailed and it backed off. It was a warning to me to stay away or else be prepared for the consequences. Something like the Naga militants used to do. They gave a fair warning before conducting their deadly ambushes.

 

Which reminded me of ‘Uncle Chuba’ whom we met in Dimapur. He was our friend, philosopher, and guide for our Nagaland trip. He took us for a Kohima & Khonoma tour many years ago. On the way he told the driver to halt suddenly. We thought it must be an urgent call of nature but it was something else instead.

 

Two Naga’s were sitting by the road with something wrapped in leaves. Inquisitiveness got the better of me. I too got out of the car to see what Uncle Chuba was so excited about. He took time to haggle for the price which was delaying our move to our destination.

 

What are you buying Uncle Chuba, I asked? Wasp nests, he said. He paid two hundred bucks for the small one about six inches diameter and three hundred for the second one double its size. To tell whether they were fresh or not he pulled out a ‘wasp larva’ from the nest and slurped it, then gave me one to taste. Yuck, I said.  ‘Bahut Taza hai,’ said he, aur khatta-khatta bhi. In the evening join us for dinner, he said. We would prepare a delicacy with bamboo shoots and wasp larva. I started thinking of excuses to avoid him for dinner.

 

Be that as it may. I told these wasps here, that if you guys don’t leave, I shall call Chuba Uncle, who would eat you alive. Wasps did not pay heed to my warning at all.

 

Why are you multiplying in such numbers, I asked them? ‘More the merrier,’ they said. Then why don’t you stick to your traditional nests you already have rather than roaming around issuing threats to us. I have been decent enough to allow you to take water freely and still. Have you guys been thrown out of your tribe, I asked? They looked at me in bewilderment and continued with their recce.

 

Don’t you guys use protection? To which they laughed and told me to stop asking silly questions, before they give me the taste of their sting.

 

An innovative idea came to my mind when they refused to listen to my request. There was a bottle of ‘hand sanitizer’ with a powerful ‘atomiser’ lying at the window sill. I picked it up and gave them a nice spray. They didn’t like it at all, rather got blinded and hit the wall as if someone had blindfolded their eyes. I sprayed a little extra, where they had marked to start the new nest. Within seconds that team scooted and I breathed a sigh of relief.

 

Will those nasty wasps return? I wonder!!!!!!!!!

 

JAI HIND

© NOEL ELLIS