RAA KI SAZISH

 

 

LT COL NOEL ELLIS

 

22/II/2025

 

I was standing at the counter of our Doodh-Dahi wala. Yours truly being a regular gets a special treatment.

 

The man across the counter was in a deep discussion with some customers. The subject caught my attention. People in India were aware the way “wanted people” were being eliminated by ‘unknown assassins’ in Pakistan.

 

Pakistan always sees the hand of India in general and ‘Raa’ in particular in doing all that. I kept on the “listening watch”. The topic shifted to cricket.

 

The ‘Champions Trophy’ is on. India is playing after showing great reluctance much to the anguish of hosts Pakistan. We agreed to play at neutral venues like Dubai. This cheesed off PCB.

 

After their humiliating loss in their first match, am sure Pakistan is not looking forward to play with us. Players know the ‘jootis’ they will get if they lose.

 

The rumour is that TV companies have already sent TV additional sets in anticipation of the rage which will be generated at their loss at the hands of India. Hope it remains a rumour.

 

The conversation at that shop pointed out to the way Pakistan took total revenge for not playing in Pakistan. They plotted a plan to embarrass India, by not flying the Tri-Colour in the row of flags displayed for the participating countries.

 

Technically and politically, they conveyed the correctness of their blunder that India is not playing in Pakistan so why should the Indian flag be displayed. In Pakistan anything can happen especially goof ups like this.

 

People in Pakistan were asking “roti khaan nu paise hai nahi, stadium de renovation de lai kitthon aa gaye”. It is prestige issue for them. They have to show that they are a ‘safe’ country with no terrorism. All chaos happening in Pakistan is being done by India.

 

My mind drifted into a day dream having collected my packet. Let me share it with you.

 

This ‘no flag display’ was not taken well by “Mota Bhai ka Beta”. He immediately called up papa. He told dad about the fiasco and it had to be avenged. Mota Bhai took it very seriously and promised to do everything under the sun before the tournament got over.

 

Somewhere in the afternoon after returning from a political rally Mota Bhai called up the Internal Security Advisor. “Doval Bhai, suna aap ne, hamara jhanda nahi lagaya Pakistan ne”. Doval Bhai with groggy eyes was getting out of his afternoon siesta mode, had no clue of what had happened.

 

“Mota Bhai, yahan cheen aur Bangladesh ne le rakhi hai aur aap ko cricket ki padi hai”, he quipped. Mota Bhai got furious and said “kuch karo nahi to tumhari Naukri khatre main hai. We cannot tolerate this nonsense”.

 

“We can take care of all the terrorists they send to Kashmir. We have our great army to look after that. We can reply in the UN about the Pakistani false allegations but how can they insult us by not displaying our flag. You do something, is it clear”, said Mota Bhai to Doval Bhai.

 

Doval Bhai cursed his luck and called the most ‘under utilized’ asset of India. The CID, CBI, ED chiefs did not respond to his call as they were busy taking a ‘dubki’ somewhere in central India.

 

Doval Bhai to Raw Chief. “Brief me on this Flag issue in next one hour. Your presentation should include the reasons, consequences, and ways to take revenge. Remember, these are Mota Bhai’s orders”.

 

In the ops room, instead of the Pakistani, Bangladeshi and Chinese maps there were satellite photos and drone footages of all stadiums hosting Champions Trophy matches.

 

“There, said Doval, see they deliberately did not fly our flag. Call the High Commissioner of Pakistan and convey the PMs displeasure. Tell the Indian High Commissioner in Pakistan to lodge a formal complaint. “Sir, our diplomatic mission in Pakistan closed”. “Never mind,” said Doval.

 

A plan was made and the time and place of its execution was chosen. The boot had to be given to Pakistan in Pakistan. One hacker called “Mr Bakkrudin Maveshi” was hired for the issue.

 

During a match of Australia and England, it was the turn for the National Anthem of Australia to be played. What we heard instead, Jana Gana Mana Adhinayak…. The whole stadium broke into laughter.

 

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/F9gwAtyBo0M

 

Breaking news on Paki media was that it was “Raa Ki Sazish”. They hacked our systems and planted their National Anthem. Further, India has mixed “jamaal ghota” in the biryani the Pakistani teams are having in Dubai. If they loose, Raa has to be blamed. The poor console operator has been sacked as he was a Raa agent.

 

I kept laughing and reached home. What all sazish can Raa can do? I wonder!!!!!!!

 

JAI HIND

©® NOEL ELLIS

Disclaimer- This is an article in light humour with no intention to hurt anyone.