Skip to main content

KISSA KISSY KA

 

KISSA KISSY KA


LT COL NOEL ELLIS

11/VIII/2023

This article is in light humour with malice to none.

In our childhood, one often recited something like this

Kiss Kiss ko Kiss Karen

Kiss Miss ko Miss Karen

Kiss Miss ko Kiss Karen (Add flying before the last kiss)

 

A gesture led to utter chaos when people had congregated to create more ruckus than a kindergarten school. They shout, abuse, yell, shriek, cry, call names, ridicule, scream, mimic, jester, recite poems and Sher-o-shayari, as if they have no other work to do. Rather, they are paid from our taxes to make a mockery of an august house and the people they represent.

 

I didn’t watch the proceedings live but seems a ‘bawaal’ of sorts was created by a Flying Kiss (FK). Ladies felt offended. A few men who missed out on the opportunity to send FKs, felt why didn’t they do it. So they went into rage against a man who probably never blew one to begin with. Even if he did it, he did it openly and was not caught watching porn.

 

Later when I watched the recording, I swear, I must protest that it was most silly gesture and absolutely unlike a flying kiss. Kam se kam flying kiss to seekh lo janab. If this is called a FK, then girls and boys should sit on dharna to teach this bachelor about FKs.

 

He instead of throwing the ball at the wicket keepers end, threw it at the bowling end. Many people got ‘kissed’ out, read it with a P. Earlier, there were hugs and now there were kisses that too of the flying category. Sir, you got to improve your aim. It cannot be “kahin pe nigahen kahin pe nishana”.

 

Friend, I pity your choice too. If you meant that FK for the chair, then I have an issue and if you sent it flying towards the ‘most hurt’, then you need to see a doctor. Young man wake up! There are better places and better people to show your affection to. Hope you have ‘kissed’ in real life to understand the meaning of an FK.

 

The ‘flying kisser of the day’ should be charged for being partial. Ladies huddled to complain. They actually meant to say why wasn’t the FK directed towards them.

 

One minister would now propose a new ‘Anti Flying Kiss Bill’. They can bring an ordinance before the session ends. The speaker would say, all those in favour of this AFK bill may blow an FK. Believe you me, it would be passed with all hands blowing FKs including the people opposing it.

 

 

All of us remember our ‘first kiss’. No, your pets are not counted. Once done, then ‘ye dil mange more’ was the condition. If you couldn’t get a actual one, then an FK meant the real thing, especially when you were surrounded with people.

 

 

Film actors and actresses shower FKs at a drop of a hat with both their hands. Is it to show love and affection or is it to show gratitude to their fans? They do it openly. They even return FKs without getting worked up. Here too there was an ex-actor, deeply engrossed in a character, discussing serious matters while reading her ‘tutored script’.

 

These days emojis of hearts, winks 😉 and kisses are showered on social media blatantly and openly to known and unknown. It becomes an issue when you send a wink and a wrong emoji with a kiss and red lips gets selected. What do we do then? Sue him or her, I suppose.

 

Imagine, if a gesture can convert ‘wiping of the mouth’ to a flying kiss, then what will pulling out your pants from your cheeks, when you get up to speak mean.

 

FK became a non-stop debate on every Indian news channel. They called him a ‘misogynist’. The Dictionary described it a person who “dislikes, despises or is strongly prejudiced against women”. With the ‘man’ in question, it should be the other way round.

 

The discussion went on to prove him to be a woman-hater, anti-feminist, male-chauvinist, male-supremacist, a person who discriminates/hates women. Further, this man was charged with sexism, bias, bigotry, discrimination, intolerance against women. My foot. I switched channels.

 

This got me to search ‘types of kisses’ on google. Friends, you will be surprised that there are more than fifty ways to kiss but FK doesn’t find a mention. Now, what shall the law makers do, sue google for missing out on the FK.

 

I feel all this chaos was created to divert from the main issue because of Misandry (/mɪsˈændri/) which is the hatred of, contempt for, or prejudice against men or boys. One in particular. Sir, you better improve your Flying Kiss standards and choices.

 

Will this ‘Kissa Kissy Ka’ ever end? I wonder!!!!!!!!

 

JAI HIND

© ® NOEL ELLIS

 😘💓😋

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

FINGER ON YOUR LIPS

  LT COL NOEL ELLIS   29/IV/2025   What has happened to Pakistan? While India is doing Fauji Exercises, Pakistan has mobilised for what! I agree that the people of India want revenge. But, from whom? Our PM has only said that “we will not leave the terrorists and their supporters till the end of the Earth”. He has never said he will sort out Pakistan, or has he?   It has been hilarious watching discussions on Paki social media channels. They seem to have already given up. Our RM meets the PM and Pakistan starts shitting bricks. They talk about jazba and gazwa, and start telling us about their nuclear arsenal. 160 I suppose. By the way we will send across one equivalent to your 160 if need be.   There is a saying, ‘Chor ki Dari main tinka” literal meaning is, a straw in a thief’s beard. However, the deep meaning is that a guilty person reveals his guilt through his behaviour, even unintentionally. Clearly, “a guilty conscious needs no accuser”...

SCENE AT ELLIS’ RESTAURANT

    LT COL NOEL ELLIS   04/XI/2024   Every morning the scene in the Ellis’ restaurant is so refreshing. The notes birds sing sounds like ‘reveille’ being sounded by the buglers. The ‘scenario’ keeps varying with arrival of different birds at different timings.   It is like being a restaurant owner, working solo with minimum help. Yours truly is the waiter, housekeeper, cook, receptionist, barman, purchase manager, accountant, and storekeeper of this shack. Imagine!   Foremost thing in the morning is housekeeping of the garden area, followed by watering the pots. This gives the plants a nice bath, like kids being readied for school.   The first set of ‘clients’ called the ‘Tailor Birds’ appear. They love to hunt for insects which get disturbed by the watering ritual. They sing and dance, hop and skip and carry on chasing moths and worms, without bothering about my presence.   By then the Bulbuls and the Sparrows start lini...

IF THERE IS A WAR…...

    LT COL NOEL ELLIS   28/IV/2025   I remember the 1971 war as a small child. We were in Kapurthala Punjab, very close to the Pakistan border. It was an evening in December, I do not remember the exact date. While returning from a friends house, the declaration of war was done as I skipped along the ‘Thandi Sarak’ of Kapurthala.   The gist was that a vehicle with loud speakers was telling people to head home as an "emergency" had been declared and war had started. I ran as fast as I could, shivering with fear and my heart beating unusually fast. Though I was a lap baby when the 1965 war had taken place, it appeared serious business now.   Overnight, Dad and other Uncles started digging trenches infront of our homes. Carbon paper was no dearth in a teachers house, so mom got into an overdrive to stick them to the glass windows. Though the glass had been painted during the 1965 war, some broken panes had been replaced. Mom told ...